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Author Topic: Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!  (Read 862 times)

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"The Awesome One" Thomas Liger

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Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!
« on: July 24, 2013, 11:58:53 am »



The VikingTron shoots up, showing a television monitor on NBC on Saturday Night. Halfway through Saturday Night Live a special segment on the show is aired featuring the newly crowned VWF Britannia Heavyweight champion, “The Awesome One” Thomas Liger.



The digital short starts in a Home for Boys with Special Needs, where we see Thomas Liger enter. He is greeted by the administrator.

Admin: Thank you so much, Mr. Liger for coming to see Brandon today.

Liger: Hey, The Awesome One is just glad he can accommodate a fan.

Admin: Brandon as you may know is terminally ill and only has a few months to live.

Liger: Uh huh.

Admin: We’ll he’s been here most of his 7 years of life and he just wants to visit the mall before he dies, see all the amazing stores for kids and also ride the carousel  that they have in the center of the building.

Liger: Well, that is not a problem at all madam. So where is the little guy?

Brandon then strolls up in his wheel chair with a big smile on his face.

Brandon: Right here, Mr. Liger.

Liger: Please, please, call me Thomas kid.

Admin: What about me?

Liger: You can just call me The Awesome One.

Another kid strolls out with a Mysterious fan shirt on.

Liger: And you can call yourself a loser.

*mild laughter from SNL audience is heard.*

Liger: Come Brandon. I’ll take him from here, Madam.

Admin: Have fun Brandon.

Brandon: I will.

Liger: You bet your bottom you will. Ever rode in a limo before, kid?

Brandon: I always wanted to!

Liger: Well today’s your lucky day!

Liger opens the limo door for Brandon, but Brandon looks a bit flustered.

Liger: What is it Brandon?

Brandon: I can’t walk, Thomas. And you have nowhere to place my wheelchair on this vehicle.

Liger: Oh, that’s rig….no…that is absolutely wrong!

Brandon: Really?

Liger: Just watch?

The scene then changes to an angle where we see Brandon in the limo having a great time….while his wheelchair is being dragged by the tail of the limo using a chain. More laughter from SNL audience is heard. The scene changes to the mall. Where Brandon is still somehow able to use his damaged wheelchair.

Brandon: Wow!

Liger: Something, isn’t it kid?

Brandon: It sure is.

Brandon then sees the petting zoo store and his eyes just widen with joy.

Brandon: Oh, oh Thomas can we go to the petting zoo first? Please!

Liger: Absolutely, Brandon. You got it.

Suddenly 2 girls walk by….

Girl 1: Look at that lazy bastard.

Girl 2: Yeah that young pup won’t even walk.

Thomas then stops them and has a word with them.

Liger: Excuse me. You see a young boy here who can not walk naturally and you assume he’s lazy? What, does his terminal illness bother you that much that call him a bastard!?

Girl 1: Back off jerk, we were talking about that fat dog in the window!

Liger then looks and sees the said dog, who is so fat he can not even stand on his feet without his stomach touching the floor first.

Liger: Oh, well so was I.

*laughter from SNL audience heard*

Liger: Now Brandon, I’m sorry. But I want this to be the best day of your life and I don’t want any interference from the cruel outside world.

Brandon: Ok.

Liger: Alright! Now lets go to that petting zoo!

Brandon: Yay!

Numerous shots of Brandon petting puppies and cats are shown. Such a beautiful time, numerous “aww’s” from the SNL crowd. They finally leave the petting zoo, and a group of teenage boys walk by.

Teen 1: And what do they call you? “Wheels?”

Liger furiously grabs the teenager.

Liger: So you see a handicapped boy and give him smartass nicknames?

Smarta$$ appears  out of nowhere.

Smarta$$: Oh yeah!

*laughter from SNL crowd*

Liger: You think because he looks lazy and won’t walk that he couldn’t do something about it.

Teen: Chill out dude, I was quoting Wolverine from X-men!

Liger: Oh is that right?

Teen: Yeah! We’re going to see The Wolverine right now at AMC and we’re stoked! Jesus!

The teen holds up his movie ticket.

Liger: I see that. We’ll then, as you were boys.

Brandon is seen with a sad face.

Liger: Hey hey, no crying, son. The days not over yet. Lets move on.

Numerous shots of Liger and Brandon throughout the mall are show. Many shots of Brandon having fun in many stores shown, along with people laughing at the sight, though not at Brandon, but joyous laughter of a boy having fun, but of course Liger doesn’t see it that way and intervenes, successfully ruining the experience for Brandon, much to the joy of the laughing SNL crowd.

Liger and Brandon are at a Little Ceasers stand, where there lots of signs advertising their “Hot-n-Ready pizzas.”

Liger: You want a Hot-n-Ready Brandon?

Brandon: Yeah!

Behind Liger are 2 teenage girls.

Girl 1: He looks about hot-n-ready.

Girl 2: Mmmhmmm.

Liger: Hey, I understand my good looks but show the dying ugly kid some respect!

Girl1: We were talking the guy wearing the mascot outfit in the 100 degree weather jack-ass!

Brandon: Dying ugly kid?

Brandon starts to cry, Liger gives him a hug while also giving the girls a mean look. As they walk away giving him the finger, but of course the fingers are censored. Numerous shots of them eating their pizza, with Brandon trying to fake a smile but not succeeding at it. Finally they come to what Brandon has been wanting to do all along…the Carousel.

Liger: Alright, buddy! We’ve made it. Are you ready?

Brandon: I guess so.

Liger: Hey, what is it? You’re not giving it to me man.

Brandon: I wish you weren’t so…overly sensitive when it comes to me.

Liger: Is this about the girls? Listen, I just want this to be the best day of your life.

Brandon: I’ve had better treatment in luiekema therapy!

Liger: Oh, that’s not fair. Come on, lets just get you on that carousel and it will go away.

Brandon: You promise.

Liger: I promise. Now what animal you want to ride?

Brandon: The lion!

Liger: One lion coming up!

Liger sees the lion is taken, he quickly jumps and talks to the kid occupying it.

Liger: Kid, off. My boy over there wants this lion.

Kid: No I was here first.

Liger: And he will most likely die first so away with you.

Kid’s Dad: Hey, what is your problem, pal.

Liger: This is between me and the kid.

Dad: That kid will live through one round, so get off my kid’s back.

Liger: Oh so you’re saying he can’t live through 2 rounds?

Dad: What?

Liger: Are you threatening him?
 
Dad: What? No.

Liger: You walk pass him, assume the worst, cover your kids face like the germophobe you are, wipe any surface with his terminal germs like the American savvy homeboy you want to be.

Dad: What? I don’t un….

Liger: Let me tell you something, that boy will wipe this surface with YOU, because I’m gonna do it for him!

A fight ensues, with Brandon hiding his face away in shame with more SNL crowd laughter heard. 20 minutes later, Liger approaches Brandon as we see an obviously damaged carousel behind them.

Liger: Brandon….I’m sorry.

Brandon: No you’re not! Take me home, I never want to see you again.

Liger: Surely there’s something else you’ve always wanted to do that can come close to this?

Brandon: No, leave me alone!

Liger walks off in shame, and then an idea pops into his head.

Liger: Oh yes there is boy, in fact something even better!

Brandon: ……like what?

The scene then jumps into Liger’s limo where see Liger riding with a big smile on his face, and we see Brandon strapped in his wheelchair being dragged by the limo on the highway. Although this quite dangerous, Brandon seems to be enjoying it.

Liger: Nothing like putting a big smile on a fan’s face.

*SNL crowd laughs hard and applauds as the digital short fades to black.*
« Last Edit: July 24, 2013, 01:42:55 pm by CT »
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Bobby Bostwick

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Re: Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!
« Reply #1 on: July 24, 2013, 01:44:27 pm »

Man, the Digital Shorts have really gone down hill...
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Caretaker

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Re: Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!
« Reply #2 on: July 24, 2013, 01:46:41 pm »

Were they ever uphill?
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i added a tanner summers seg.  not sure if i have the authority to change the main post, but call the cops i don't give a fuck.

Bobby Bostwick

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Re: Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!
« Reply #3 on: July 24, 2013, 01:59:55 pm »

This is no Dick in a Box
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Caretaker

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Re: Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!
« Reply #4 on: July 24, 2013, 02:12:18 pm »

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i added a tanner summers seg.  not sure if i have the authority to change the main post, but call the cops i don't give a fuck.

Maverick

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Re: Liger Does an SNL Digital Short!
« Reply #5 on: August 15, 2013, 08:13:14 pm »

SHENANIGANS

That's not Crimson's pic base.
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